One decision can change the whole outcome of ones life for better and one wrong decisions can also turn out to be a great night mare and shatter the life of a person. You can ask that man who decided to apply for that competition and won and you can ask that guy who decided to get involved in the execution of the robbery and now sentenced to life in prison and same senerio can be replicated in critical areas such as business, marriage, relationship, family, ministry and health
This principle from systemism is universally applicable not only to religious circle but also families, corporate and other areas
In the philosophy we say that to achieve sustained happiness peace and prosperity you must identify the area in the system designed to you based on the natural traits, grace, potentials and ability to function and function within the scope/jurisdiction that role and abilities define/permits you. One major problem in life today reason for chaos and frustration many people are facing is that they don’t know who they are and their place is in the system where they are designed to be and function within the scope, they keep trying several things and trying to fit in where they are not cut out for for all the wrong reasons
Now I’ll help you out again. The Evangelical ministry in Christiandom is one of the 5 fold ministry and they are primary responsibility is soul winning the are like the marketing/sales team of the church organization. But we know that not everyone has the grace and abilities to talk to people convincingly and win them over so inside the department we have several roles so you can know based on the natural abilities, grace, potentials and passion/interest where you best fit in
1 Goers – we have the goers who are skillful in talking has great charisma and communicating skill to convince and win people over. They are the once in the forefront of the job of evangelism
2 Growers – These are the coordinators, mentor, leaders, counseling, inspiring, training, who offer foundational support for the goers and givers, they train, Educate, motivate, counsel and even encourage the whole team to keep flame, they revamped fire and release them
3 Givers – These people have great passion for evangelism but they are pained that they can neither face the public of unbeliever to speak or even inspire train and encourage the goers so they decide to do other things but can provide other resources that the goers and growers need to do their jobs efficiently and effectively. They provide financial resources, material resouces, their connection to access/gain entrance into some difficult terrain etc
Now you know, find out where you fit in and begin to make your self useful. Happiness and fulfillment in life is tied to your usefulness and you can only be useful when you give in to work and taking responsibilities
In thrivehood, we have all three roles and can further run test to help you ascertain where you best fit in in case you’re not sure. For each roles (givers, growers, goers,) we set it up awesome reward system to earn bountiful from your efforts and contribution
And God breathe in man the breath of life and man became a living soul. And once the breath of man ceases; he loose his Life. Through breathing into man’s nostrils God transfer his spirit which is the propelling force that drive and direct the actions of man. This reveals something deep in what I have heard about breath control and it’s effect in influence and positive affect your thoughts and actions and performance in all areas of life.
Making decisions that hurt other people does not make you a bad person. It is good to choose what gives you happiness, boosts your personal development or increases your productivity – it’s referred to as virtue of rational selfishness as Ayn Rand put it
Heart Broken Groom Cries Out, Seeks Divorce 24 hours After Marriage, After He Discover His Bride Lied( See Shocking Details)
So far in preceeding episodes of life choices we have tried to expantiate on some guiding principles and key indices from the philosophy of system for making best choice that will guarantee a desired outcome because of how crucial and weighty some decisions are.
Marriage decisions are one of such and as much as I believe in chastity for selfish interest, other things come into play in making such lifelong decision and if we neglect any of those key indices, it will definitely cost us greatly as we are vulnerable to making wrong decisions especially now that there are so many lies and deceit among people of today
Many 21th century couples marry their partners for the wrong reasons, looking out for attributes like, physical looks or other characteristics the supposed partner might posses. Unfortunately to such spouse who might likely get disappointment, if they don’t get what they bargained for. Many of such spouse is a newly wedded Ghanaian man who regrettably seek to withdraw from a marriage he had just gotten into. The groom who went to seek the advice of a relationship expert as he narrate a rather funny experience, he encountered with his bride after their wedding ceremony.
Contemplating whether or not if he should leave his wife within 24 hours after they got married in a church . According to GhanaSummary,
The man’s thought of getting a divorce from his wife of one day is due to his realization that the shape of the woman he thought he was marrying is not the same as the one he married. Sharing his disappointment, the man who shared his grievances with popular relationship expert David Papa Bondze-Mbir said; he and the wife had agreed to stay chaste during dating.
All through their time of courtship he had known his woman to have a well endowed backside which is one of the things that got him attracted to her. But on the night of their wedding when they decided to consummate their marriage for the first time, he was surprised to to see that the backside of her wife was not as big as he had thought.
For him, the big backside was a deal breaker and he has been disturbed since coming to the realization that his wife actually had smaller size than he thought.
Sadly, most person get married for horrible reasons and will probably seem obvious and maybe even a little ridiculous. Others times a lot of us,taking out the most essential reasons to be married, selfishly settle for mere attractions such as height, size, body shape and so on. Basically, when you get married, things can get even better even if they do not possess they body shape they may desire.
Despite been disappointed with a partner’s look after marriage, committing to someone by getting married amplifies all facets of your relationship with them. So if you genuinely love and respect one another, even though she’s flawed ,love and respect can heal gap distrust might have created, giving a little space for growth which would inadvertently led the marriage to evolve.
What are your thoughts on this? Kindly leave a comment
I want to share something very important on making best choice today – it’s not news that your present reality is a result of your past decisions and if you want a more desirable tomorrow you must be cautious about the decision you make today
*Now I want to share with you the principle of might-equals-right in making decisions of which although aware of but have not really been cautious about it and has cost me a lot. The principle says that since there’s no option/alternative that doesn’t come with both good and bad or pleasure/pain hence you evaluate the possible negative/bad consequences associated with each options and make decisions based on the one which you have a relatively higher might/capacity/strength to contain or endure it’s negative aspect than the other.
For instance if you say you want to be a maths expert there are many alternatives each with their own advantage and disadvantages so your decision on an alternative is based on the one which you are adequately prepared/empowered/capacity to take on the speculated challenges or difficulty or pain – this simply mean that your area of strengths put you at advantage to effectively scale the hurdle of the pain/negative aspect of the chosen alternative/options
It also present itself in marriage/romantic relationship in the quote which says that: it’s impossible to find someone who won’t hurt you or cause you tears but choose the one who is worth the pain – talking about the value overweighing the disvalue or that you have what it takes to handle the dark sides
In business/investment you consider the possible risk areas you, then ask yourself: This side of the business that is not very palatable – the risk or challenges, can I contain it and keep progressing despite it’s interference? won’t this affect my progress? Do I have enough structure in place to take care of this aspect of this business/investment so that it doesn’t affect the expected outcome?
Once you are sure you have the might to deal with the negative aspect associated with an alternative such that it can’t affect you obtaining the positive side (because you have ability to manage it) and moving you to the desired outcome then that’s the best choice go ahead with it
Always choose that option which you have highest control over the negative aspect/consequences in all concerns of life and see you soaring always
There’s a part 2 of this application of this principle, keep in following us on LIFE CHOICES
Everyone says that when you meet the person you’re meant to spend your life with, you’ll just know. Sure, some people may have an a-ha moment where the heavens open up and the universe screams, “It’s him!”; for others, it’s a subtle set of changes over the course of the relationship. Here are a few of the signs you’re finally with your true soulmate.
1. YOU HAVE NO DESIRE TO LOOK BACKWARD.It’s natural after a long relationship or a bad breakup to constantly be thinking about what happened and what could have been. Everyone mourns lost love differently, but a clear sign you’re with the person who’s your future is when you realize that you no longer find yourself thinking about your ex. Why would you when everything you want is right in front of you?
2. EVERY DAY WITH HIM FEELS EXCITING NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU’VE BEEN TOGETHER.Even when the honeymoon stage is overand you’re well into the routine of coupledom, waking up in the mornings happy to share each day with him shows that you’re in it for the long haul. You know him so well and yet you can’t help but want to know more and to share more about yourself. Loving him never gets old.
3. HE GENUINELY RESPECTS YOU AS A PARTNER.Unlike a guy who likes you but clearly sees himself as Prince Charming come to save you, your future husband knows that you’re independent, brilliant, and more than capable of anything all on your own. In fact, that’s why he loves you. He’ll ask your opinion on things and actually listen to what you have to say—and when it comes to decisions about your life together, he’ll always make them with you
4. YOU CAN TRUST HIM WITH ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING.We all have things we find hard to share even with our closest friends or partners but it’s different with him. You know you can let him in on your secrets, hopes, fears, and all the things no one else about you knows. If you know without a shadow of a doubt that he’ll keep them safe, he’s a keeper.
5. HE ISN’T AFRAID OF A LITTLE CONFLICT.No relationship is perfect and even the best couples will sometimes have disagreements. A real man and the one you want to be with forever will embrace the challenges you face rather than being afraid to communicate with you and he’ll be willing to give as much as he takes. If you and your guy know you can get through any hiccup, it’s a sign you’re meant to be.
6. EVEN THE SKEPTICS IN YOUR LIFE ASSUME YOU’LL BE GETTING MARRIED.Some family and friends like to ring wedding bells the minute someone new comes into your life, but then there are the few people closest to you who are convinced no one in the world is good enough. When they start talking about the future wedding or making plans with your beau in mind, you know it’s real.
7. YOU ACCEPT EACH OTHER FOR EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE.When your partner’s quirks are your favorite attributes and you’re able to be your authentic selves when you’re together, you’ve found your true soulmate. We all put up some kind of front as we go through life, slowly revealing more and more of our true selves to those who prove that they won’t run away. Once you and your guy have gotten to that level, there’s no turning back.
8. THE IDEA OF BEING WITH ANYONE ELSE IS ABSURD.Not only are you uninterested in the random attractive guy walking down the street or the endless social media posts about dating apps, but the thought of dating someone other than this guy is almost comical. Now that you know what it’s like to be with him and to love and be loved by him, there’s nothing else you could possibly want. In fact, you literally can’t picture life without him.
9. HE TAKES CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU’RE SICK.If you’re a snotty, messy ball on the couch and he still finds you beautiful, wrap him up and hold on tight. The “in sickness and in health” section of wedding vows is a real promise and if he’s already showing that he’ll hold up that end of the bargain, you can trust him to follow through.
10. YOU KNOW YOU’VE BECOME A BETTER PERSON SINCE HE CAME AROUND.You’re not just a better girlfriend, but you’re better at your job, more loyal to your friends, and a more understanding sister, daughter, and person. He’s shown you a version of yourself that was always in there but hiding behind the surface, and you’re so proud that she’s now in the world.
11. THINKING ABOUT THE FUTURE ISN’T SCARY ANYMORE.We never know exactly what is coming down the road, but with him by your side, that’s no longer terrifying. Whatever happens, you know he’ll do everything he can to make you happy for the rest of your life, and that’s the best feeling in the world
10 habits of happy people that you need to learn to boost your wellbeing
A study has found early risers are less likely than night owls to suffer from mental health problems.
While it might not be possible to alter your body clock, there are other ways of boosting your well-being as psychotherapist Noel McDermott, left, explains here.
Get enough sleep
Sleep itself is one of the biggest things that can impact on our happiness. Noel says: “Lack of sleep is really stressful.
“People really need to think about their sleep hygiene.
It is not about sleeping for a certain amount of hours, it is about doing what is right for you.
“Normal sleep can be anything between five to 10 hours a night.
“It may sound simple, but making your bed in the morning can set you up for a positive day.
“Research has found this simple task starts a chain reaction of productivity for the whole day.”
Spending a few minutes a day practising mindfulness and meditation can transform your mental health.
There are apps available to download or videos on YouTube, and mindfulness is available on the NHS via GPs.
Noel says: “It is the simplest thing in the world to do. But it can help you deal with the stressful situations life throws at us.”
Learn to forgive
When you are unhappy and stressed out, your body produces stress hormones.
“Our brain is designed to focus on possible threats, because they might kill us,” Noel says.
“So when we are really angry or upset with somebody, or are harbouring resentment, our brain brings us back to that thought.
“When we go back to those thoughts our body produces stress hormones, and stress is the biggest killer in our society, it is the biggest cause of depression.
“Stress reduces the body’s capacity to fight off infections, so you are more likely to get ill.
“If you tell yourself to think nice things about somebody, they stop being a threat inside your brain and you feel better about them and the whole situation.”
If you clean the dishes in your sink you are going to feel better.
Noel explains: “The pay off of such a small task is ridiculously big, the sense of well-being you get. Investing in cleaning and tidying is investing in your own well-being.”
Get green fingered
Gardening or even growing a potted plant in your house is shown to make us happier.
Noel says: “You are watching the plant grow while nurturing it. This leads to an emotional boost. Our bodies are designed to be hunter gatherers who lived in nature.
“The world has changed, but our bodies haven’t.”
Get more friends
Noel says: “If people are depressed they are usually socially isolated. One of the key things to help this is to broaden your social network.
“When we have a diverse group of people around us, it makes us feel good and produces hormones which make us feel better.
“This can increase your life expectancy by five to 10 years.”
Ignore your phone
If you put down your phone to listen properly to a conversation, or even concentrate on a TV programme rather than scrolling through social media it can actually help you to feel more connected to the world.
Noel says: “Evidence shows that if you can manage today well, then tomorrow is likely to be better and then yesterday will cease to be of any significance.”
We all know that exercise is good for us but Noel says: “It is not about saying I am going to go to the gym five times a week. It has got to fit in with our lifestyle, as part of our daily tasks.
“Walking is fantastic – getting off the bus or tube earlier than normal, getting up from your desk and going for a quick walk.
“Adding that sort of exercise into our lives is shown to have hugely positive effects on our health and well-being.”
Being in nature has been shown to have fantastic effects on our mental health. Noel explains: “You don’t have to go climbing Ben Nevis or trek in the wilderness. Going to the local park has hugely positive effects.
“One study showed that even noticing a tree at your bus stop is an engagement with nature that improves your emotional, mental and physical health.
“When we engage with natural objects like plants and trees we go into a meditative state, it moves our consciousness from one part of the brain to another, so we get some of the effects of meditation simply from being with nature.”
Get a pet
Owning a pet has been shown to make people happier for three different reasons.
Noel explains: “Firstly you are nurturing another living thing, which goes back to the benefits of kindness. Secondly, if you have a pet like a dog then you have to walk it which takes you outside and is a form of exercise.
“Thirdly if you stroke or hug a pet it actively reduces stress – you are less likely to have a heart attack if you stroke a pet. Also, animals like dogs adore us and it‘s a really nice feeling to be adored.”
The simple act of smiling has been found to reduce stress and increase happiness – even if you are forcing or faking the smile.
Noel says: “Putting on a happy face actually makes you happier. And you smile at others – friends, family members or even a complete stranger – it can actually make them happier too.”
Do This While You’re Waiting For Your Perfect Person
By Sylvia Salow
People are good at postponing their lives until they meet the right person to share their lives with. We don’t engage in our dreams and goals enough because we think like what is now is not it.
We don’t live our lives like we mean it because we don’t have that wonderful partner by our side who will solve all our issues.
If you’re caught up in between the two worlds and waiting for your other half, then read on.
This is the only solution that you won’t ever regret: choose yourself instead of waiting for someone special.
Have you ever wondered how much time and energy you spend waiting for the right person? Imagine if you’d invest all that energy into yourself, your projects, your well-being instead.
Choosing yourself doesn’t mean that you must stay single.
It means that you primarily focus all of your energy on yourself and leave other people out of the equation. At least for a while.
It means investing in your dreams and making the courageous decisions that you were postponing. Focusing on yourself also means that you prioritize your desires without being dependent or attached to someone else.
Because when you see someone else as the source of your happiness then you’re prone to get disappointed. The stronger your unhealthy dependency is, the sooner the disappointment comes.
You can never find what you truly seek outside of yourself, be it love or anything else.
Even if you met the perfect partner for you, it wouldn’t solve your problems. I know that many people assume that once they’re with their other half, everything becomes effortless.
I was guilty of this belief, too. And yes, everything can be more comfortable and joyful. But no, it won’t change the person you are.
No one can do the work for you. Others can inspire you and even support you but at last, it’s all up to you.
So if you’d like to become a better version of yourself, now is the time to begin. Regardless if you’re in a relationship or not.
If you get quickly upset now or if you’re bad with money, being with someone doesn’t change that. On the contrary, it can even amplify it.
In a relationship, you become more of who you already are, with all the beauty and ugliness.
Even if you’re with the most fantastic person, you still need to continue working on yourself. Otherwise, you’ll subconsciously sabotage your happiness.
Thus, if your head is spinning around wondering where the right one is, then invest that precious energy into something you can actually impact. The side effect of living your life to the fullest is that the right person will feel drawn to you without you (necessarily) doing anything.
They’ll feel so enamored by you to the point that nothing will keep them away and then it’ll be crystal-clear who the right person for you is.
People are attracted to your inner light more than anything else. When you follow your heart and live like you mean it, then everything and everyone that belongs to you will find their way to your life.
I know that sometimes we freak out and worry about whether we end up lonely with two cats, but if someone is meant to be in your life, they will be.
You can release the control and worry and turn the attention to becoming that beautiful and empowered creature you already are within.
Choosing yourself is the smartest decision you can make. Moreover, you’ll stop feeling like a crazy person who is just thinking about being in a relationship
5 things to consider in making choices to avoid disappointments
I want to talk about expectations and reducing disappointment. Someone said where there are no expectations there’s no disappointment. Man’s self esteem is the fuel pumping out to keeping hope alive in confidence that he can acheive what he expects from activities but when he shifts that responsibility to another and trusting his hope and confidence in them then that’s where the disappointment come from and depending on the degree of trust and delicate quantity and value of substance he entrusted to them determine degree of damage and pain of disappointment he will experience if the outcome isn’t expected
To reduce it to the bearest minimum the possibility of being disappoint (not making error ooo the possibility of getting disappointment you let people and systems pass your trust test before you entrust them with expectations you hope they deliver on
Begin with little and test the waters for how faithful or trustworthy the person or system can be Check out what they say and try to match with their actions Check out for consistency Check for how long they have stayed true to what they believe and represent
I can’t count how many people I have given money for transaction, HOW MANY ladies I have given my heart to, how many schemes I have invested money in, how many that I was left disappointed because my expectations for the investment wasn’t met and funny enough I can count a couple of people I have also disappointed and in careful investigation I realized the following are factors which I shouldn’t have neglected to guide/inform my decision on enthrust something of great value expecting improve state or worst case actual state. Since we can’t do everything alone and values upon which survival and happiness depends on is dispersed in different individuals and entities across locations hence interdependency but to depend on someone for support and supply of value and escape pain of disappointment if we don’t get the essential support and supply of value as expected we consider the following although not limited to them but for the purpose of this post we limit them to five
1 Power source connectivity: As we uphold in philosophy of system/systemism that everyone and everything is interdependent and interconnected to an ultimate power source through which it access inexhaustible supplies of power to perform and deliver however if they are not properly fixed into their place in the system, the connections won’t be able strong and the flow of power that enable them perform won’t be available and which makes them unfit to be entrusted. This may sound abstract as to how one can ascertain who is connected and how well they are fixed to the system to ensure that the never run out that’s why you have to order for my online course where it’s explain in details and this factor supercede all others even when they don’t meet up with others and they have this, you can go for them. If I intend to invest in real estate I look out for common sense LTD and petinence limited based on this criteria, if I want a consultant for in corporate structure, person and human resource development I go for olakunle soriyan and the likes based on this criteria. if I want to give my heart commitment in marriage I consider this factor, if I want to invest in a country or particular location, I consider this but once this connection is ascertained to be available and the entity you intend to trust with something of great value is rightly and strongly fixed/attached/connected then you have no problem
2 Time/duration: Most of the investment and business error I have made hiterto was due to ignorance of this. Before you trust a person or organizations or system with something of value expecting of greater return you must consider the length of years they have been in existence, in consistent with their value and mission and how they have grown over the years, that’s why ladies prefer older men for relationships because of length of the experience and talking about investment, it’s safer to commit to the hands of a company or scheme that has stood the test of time. The longer the years the more guarantee that they’ll deliver. even employers are more at rest with employing candidate/staff with longer years of service
3 Area of competence/specialty – how can you give yam to goat and expect the goat to keep it safe? Disappointment is certain if you are giving something of value to someone who is not capacity or competent to manage it and provide return value you expecting. It’s like what most corporate organizations do in recruitment they employ people and assign roles/duties to people outside of their area of natural abilities, competence and interest and they wonder the underperformance and disappointment they get from low productivity and revenue. In love I can only trust a lady with areas of my interest where I have seen her demonstrate interest, competence and abilities in the lives of others especially in her previous relationship that’s why it’s important to ascertain the reason for breakup with previous relationship that it’s not a character issue but just irreconcilable differences
4 Acceptance: many people have fallen victim of disappointment because of this error of giving/entrust to individuals and organizations against their wish that’s why you hear things like cars parked at owners risk Even if it’s like guarantee trust bank if they are not ready to accept responsibility even though they have proven to be competent and reputable never entrust. Ladies and guys do this in matters of love too you see his nice responsible cute and we’ll behaved but he is not ready for relationship but because you already love him you cajole/persuade him into having an affair with you, your expectations most likely will be cut short. Let them be ready to accept the offer because many things can hinder a person/organization to not meet up with your demands/expectations and if you try to force yourself on them, you will often times disappoint
5 Quality of referees/witnesses: Who are the people that can attest to the capability competence and character of the system, organization or individual who you intend to enthrust something of value to and what is their pedigree. The more reputable organization and individuals associated and can attest to the person, system or organization you want to engage or invest in, the better the decision to invest. For instance if I see a company call for investors and I see supported by central bank, BOI, TVC and so on; I have more guarantee in their delivery than another who doesn’t have reputable individuals and organizations with high pedigree associated with their brand. So it’s not really about the number of people that can attest to the genuineness/competence of the scheme/system/products etc but it the pedigree of such people. Case study of MMM no reputable organization or individual attestation
Let’s continue in next episode
Signify if you got value and from today you consider this factor before you decide on who or what to entrust your valuable resource to