Month: May 2019

LIFE CHOICES

Episodes 33

And God breathe in man the breath of life and man became a living soul. And once the breath of man ceases; he loose his Life. Through breathing into man’s nostrils God transfer his spirit which is the propelling force that drive and direct the actions of man. This reveals something deep in what I have heard about breath control and it’s effect in influence and positive affect your thoughts and actions and performance in all areas of life.

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LIFE CHOICES

Episodes 33

Common factors that hinder most single people from getting true love

Some people are single by choice while others have got stereotypes surrounding love and relationships in general.

They have certain beliefs that always keep them in their desperate situations of singlehood.

These intuitions restrain them from getting into nice and fulfilling relationships.

The following are the common beliefs that hold you back from getting into working relationships:

1. Being too picky and overly selective

You might be having very high expectations about the partner that you desire to get.

These hopes may lead to frustrations when you talk one on one with potential partners and discover that they have their weaknesses.

It’s normal to be picky but not fit to do it repetitively; be flexible.

When you are very picky, you create a lot of hurdles, and you will struggle to connect with those that you would like to be in a relationship with.

2. Fear

You may be having some panic about intimacy due to awful past experiences in your relationships, hence fear that the same will happen again.

You may be contented that  “loving too much” would actually “pain too much” in case of a breakup.

3. Low self-esteem

Some people have perceptions that no one would actually believe in them.

They allow that inner critique to convince them that no one would fall for them, however hard they may try.

Most struggle to make eye contact or making verbal communication with their potential partners.

Lack of enough self-confidence leaves them unable to open up and fail to secure their attractions.

Speaking the philosophy of system

LIFE CHOICES

5 decisions you should never apologize for

Episodes 32

Making decisions that hurt other people does not make you a bad person. It is good to choose what gives you happiness, boosts your personal development or increases your productivity – it’s referred to as virtue of rational selfishness as Ayn Rand put it

You should never apologize for these decisions;

1. Being you

To become who you are now, you used a lot of resources, work, energy and fought challenges. 

Always be proud of the steps and past hardships that have mounted you to what you are today and never apologize for that.

Let go off the relationships that you think will bring regrets before it is late. Ensure you associate yourself with people who will love you, respect and bring out the best in you. 

Never apologize for disconnecting yourself from bad relationships.

3. Achieving success

Always be proud of your hard work, sacrifice and dedication. The jealousy and negative feelings from others should never make you feel sorry for your accomplishments.

4. Saying ‘No’

Never apologize for disagreeing with what you feel is not good for you. Always respect your limits.

5. Spending ‘me’ time

Everyone needs time on their own to analyze their goals or feelings. Don’t ever say sorry for needing time for yourself. You’re the most important person

Speaking the philosophy of system

LIFE CHOICES

Heart Broken Groom Cries Out, Seeks Divorce 24 hours After Marriage, After He Discover His Bride Lied( See Shocking Details)

Episodes 31

So far in preceeding episodes of life choices we have tried to expantiate on some guiding principles and key indices from the philosophy of system for making best choice that will guarantee a desired outcome because of how crucial and weighty some decisions are.

Marriage decisions are one of such and as much as I believe in chastity for selfish interest, other things come into play in making such lifelong decision and if we neglect any of those key indices, it will definitely cost us greatly as we are vulnerable to making wrong decisions especially now that there are so many lies and deceit among people of today

Many 21th century couples marry their partners for the wrong reasons, looking out for  attributes like, physical looks or other characteristics the supposed partner might posses.  Unfortunately to such spouse who might likely get disappointment, if they don’t get what they bargained for. Many of such spouse is a newly wedded Ghanaian man who regrettably seek to withdraw from a marriage he had just gotten into.  The groom who went to seek the advice of a relationship expert as he  narrate a rather funny experience,  he encountered with his bride after their wedding ceremony.

Contemplating  whether or not if he should leave his wife within 24 hours after they got married in a church . According to GhanaSummary,

The man’s thought of getting a divorce from his wife of one day is due to his realization that the shape of the woman he thought he was marrying is not the same as the one he married. Sharing his disappointment,  the man who shared his grievances with popular relationship expert David Papa Bondze-Mbir said; he and the wife had agreed to stay chaste during dating.

All through their time of courtship he had known his woman to have a well endowed backside which is one of the things that got him attracted to her. But on the night of their wedding when they decided to consummate their marriage for the first time, he was surprised to to see that the backside of her wife was not as big as he had thought.

For him, the big backside was a deal breaker and he has been disturbed since coming to the realization that his wife actually had smaller size than he thought.

Sadly, most person get married for horrible reasons and will probably seem obvious and maybe even a little ridiculous. Others times a lot of us,taking out the most essential reasons to be married, selfishly settle for mere attractions such as height, size, body shape and so on.   Basically, when you get married, things can get even better even if they do not possess they body shape they may desire.

Despite been disappointed with a partner’s look after marriage, committing to someone by getting married amplifies all facets of your relationship with them. So if you genuinely love and respect one another,  even though she’s flawed ,love and respect can heal gap distrust might have created, giving a little space for  growth which would inadvertently led the marriage to evolve.

What are your thoughts on this? Kindly leave a comment

LIFE CHOICES

Episodes 30

I want to share something very important on making best choice today – it’s not news that your present reality is a result of your past decisions and if you want a more desirable tomorrow you must be cautious about the decision you make today

*Now I want to share with you the principle of might-equals-right in making decisions of which although aware of but have not really been cautious about it and has cost me a lot. The principle says that since there’s no option/alternative that doesn’t come with both good and bad or pleasure/pain hence you evaluate the possible negative/bad consequences associated with each options and make decisions based on the one which you have a relatively higher might/capacity/strength to contain or endure it’s negative aspect than the other.

For instance if you say you want to be a maths expert there are many alternatives each with their own advantage and disadvantages so your decision on an alternative is based on the one which you are adequately prepared/empowered/capacity to take on the speculated challenges or difficulty or pain – this simply mean that your area of strengths put you at advantage to effectively scale the hurdle of the pain/negative aspect of the chosen alternative/options

It also present itself in marriage/romantic relationship in the quote which says that: it’s impossible to find someone who won’t hurt you or cause you tears but choose the one who is worth the pain – talking about the value overweighing the disvalue or that you have what it takes to handle the dark sides

In business/investment you consider the possible risk areas you, then ask yourself: This side of the business that is not very palatable – the risk or challenges, can I contain it and keep progressing despite it’s interference? won’t this affect my progress? Do I have enough structure in place to take care of this aspect of this business/investment so that it doesn’t affect the expected outcome?

Once you are sure you have the might to deal with the negative aspect associated with an alternative such that it can’t affect you obtaining the positive side (because you have ability to manage it) and moving you to the desired outcome then that’s the best choice go ahead with it
Always choose that option which you have highest control over the negative aspect/consequences in all concerns of life and see you soaring always

There’s a part 2 of this application of this principle, keep in following us on LIFE CHOICES

Speaking the philosophy of system

LIFE CHOICES

Episodes 29

11 Signs You’ve Finally Met The Person You Should Marry

Everyone says that when you meet the person you’re meant to spend your life with, you’ll just know. Sure, some people may have an a-ha moment where the heavens open up and the universe screams, “It’s him!”; for others, it’s a subtle set of changes over the course of the relationship. Here are a few of the signs you’re finally with your true soulmate.

1. YOU HAVE NO DESIRE TO LOOK BACKWARD.It’s natural after a long relationship or a bad breakup to constantly be thinking about what happened and what could have been. Everyone mourns lost love differently, but a clear sign you’re with the person who’s your future is when you realize that you no longer find yourself thinking about your ex. Why would you when everything you want is right in front of you?

2. EVERY DAY WITH HIM FEELS EXCITING NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU’VE BEEN TOGETHER.Even when the honeymoon stage is overand you’re well into the routine of coupledom, waking up in the mornings happy to share each day with him shows that you’re in it for the long haul. You know him so well and yet you can’t help but want to know more and to share more about yourself. Loving him never gets old.

3. HE GENUINELY RESPECTS YOU AS A PARTNER.Unlike a guy who likes you but clearly sees himself as Prince Charming come to save you, your future husband knows that you’re independent, brilliant, and more than capable of anything all on your own. In fact, that’s why he loves you. He’ll ask your opinion on things and actually listen to what you have to say—and when it comes to decisions about your life together, he’ll always make them with you

4. YOU CAN TRUST HIM WITH ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING.We all have things we find hard to share even with our closest friends or partners but it’s different with him. You know you can let him in on your secrets, hopes, fears, and all the things no one else about you knows. If you know without a shadow of a doubt that he’ll keep them safe, he’s a keeper.

5. HE ISN’T AFRAID OF A LITTLE CONFLICT.No relationship is perfect and even the best couples will sometimes have disagreements. A real man and the one you want to be with forever will embrace the challenges you face rather than being afraid to communicate with you and he’ll be willing to give as much as he takes. If you and your guy know you can get through any hiccup, it’s a sign you’re meant to be.

6. EVEN THE SKEPTICS IN YOUR LIFE ASSUME YOU’LL BE GETTING MARRIED.Some family and friends like to ring wedding bells the minute someone new comes into your life, but then there are the few people closest to you who are convinced no one in the world is good enough. When they start talking about the future wedding or making plans with your beau in mind, you know it’s real.

7. YOU ACCEPT EACH OTHER FOR EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE.When your partner’s quirks are your favorite attributes and you’re able to be your authentic selves when you’re together, you’ve found your true soulmate. We all put up some kind of front as we go through life, slowly revealing more and more of our true selves to those who prove that they won’t run away. Once you and your guy have gotten to that level, there’s no turning back.

8. THE IDEA OF BEING WITH ANYONE ELSE IS ABSURD.Not only are you uninterested in the random attractive guy walking down the street or the endless social media posts about dating apps, but the thought of dating someone other than this guy is almost comical. Now that you know what it’s like to be with him and to love and be loved by him, there’s nothing else you could possibly want. In fact, you literally can’t picture life without him.

9. HE TAKES CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU’RE SICK.If you’re a snotty, messy ball on the couch and he still finds you beautiful, wrap him up and hold on tight. The “in sickness and in health” section of wedding vows is a real promise and if he’s already showing that he’ll hold up that end of the bargain, you can trust him to follow through.

10. YOU KNOW YOU’VE BECOME A BETTER PERSON SINCE HE CAME AROUND.You’re not just a better girlfriend, but you’re better at your job, more loyal to your friends, and a more understanding sister, daughter, and person. He’s shown you a version of yourself that was always in there but hiding behind the surface, and you’re so proud that she’s now in the world.

11. THINKING ABOUT THE FUTURE ISN’T SCARY ANYMORE.We never know exactly what is coming down the road, but with him by your side, that’s no longer terrifying. Whatever happens, you know he’ll do everything he can to make you happy for the rest of your life, and that’s the best feeling in the world

Speaking the philosophy of system

LIFE CHOICES

Episodes 28

Featured article

10 habits of happy people that you need to learn to boost your wellbeing

A study has found early risers are less likely than night owls to suffer from mental health problems.

While it might not be possible to alter your body clock, there are other ways of boosting your well-being as psychotherapist Noel McDermott, left, explains here.

Get enough sleep

Sleep itself is one of the biggest things that can impact on our happiness. Noel says: “Lack of sleep is really stressful.

“People really need to think about their sleep hygiene.

It is not about sleeping for a certain amount of hours, it is about doing what is right for you.

“Normal sleep can be anything between five to 10 hours a night.

“It may sound simple, but making your bed in the morning can set you up for a positive day.

“Research has found this simple task starts a chain reaction of productivity for the whole day.”

Try meditation

Spending a few minutes a day practising mindfulness and meditation can transform your mental health.

There are apps available to download or videos on YouTube, and mindfulness is available on the NHS via GPs.

Noel says: “It is the simplest thing in the world to do. But it can help you deal with the stressful situations life throws at us.”

Learn to forgive

When you are unhappy and stressed out, your body produces stress hormones.

“Our brain is designed to focus on possible threats, because they might kill us,” Noel says.

“So when we are really angry or upset with somebody, or are harbouring resentment, our brain brings us back to that thought.

“When we go back to those thoughts our body produces stress hormones, and stress is the biggest killer in our society, it is the biggest cause of depression.

“Stress reduces the body’s capacity to fight off infections, so you are more likely to get ill.

“If you tell yourself to think nice things about somebody, they stop being a threat inside your brain and you feel better about them and the whole situation.”

Do Housework

If you clean the dishes in your sink you are going to feel better.

Noel explains: “The pay off of such a small task is ridiculously big, the sense of well-being you get. Investing in cleaning and tidying is investing in your own well-being.”

Get green fingered

Gardening or even growing a potted plant in your house is shown to make us happier.

Noel says: “You are watching the plant grow while nurturing it. This leads to an emotional boost. Our bodies are designed to be hunter gatherers who lived in nature.

“The world has changed, but our bodies haven’t.”

Get more friends

Noel says: “If people are depressed they are usually socially isolated. One of the key things to help this is to broaden your social network.

“When we have a diverse group of people around us, it makes us feel good and produces hormones which make us feel better.

“This can increase your life expectancy by five to 10 years.”

Ignore your phone

If you put down your phone to listen properly to a conversation, or even concentrate on a TV programme rather than scrolling through social media it can actually help you to feel more connected to the world.

Noel says: “Evidence shows that if you can manage today well, then tomorrow is likely to be better and then yesterday will cease to be of any significance.”

Exercise

We all know that exercise is good for us but Noel says: “It is not about saying I am going to go to the gym five times a week. It has got to fit in with our lifestyle, as part of our daily tasks.

“Walking is fantastic – getting off the bus or tube earlier than normal, getting up from your desk and going for a quick walk.

“Adding that sort of exercise into our lives is shown to have hugely positive effects on our health and well-being.”

Go outside

Being in nature has been shown to have fantastic effects on our mental health. Noel explains: “You don’t have to go climbing Ben Nevis or trek in the wilderness. Going to the local park has hugely positive effects.

“One study showed that even noticing a tree at your bus stop is an engagement with nature that improves your emotional, mental and physical health.

“When we engage with natural objects like plants and trees we go into a meditative state, it moves our consciousness from one part of the brain to another, so we get some of the effects of meditation simply from being with nature.”

Get a pet

Owning a pet has been shown to make people happier for three different reasons.

Noel explains: “Firstly you are nurturing another living thing, which goes back to the benefits of kindness. Secondly, if you have a pet like a dog then you have to walk it which takes you outside and is a form of exercise.

“Thirdly if you stroke or hug a pet it actively reduces stress – you are less likely to have a heart attack if you stroke a pet. Also, animals like dogs adore us and it‘s a really nice feeling to be adored.”

Smile

The simple act of smiling has been found to reduce stress and increase happiness – even if you are forcing or faking the smile.

Noel says: “Putting on a happy face actually makes you happier. And you smile at others – friends, family members or even a complete stranger – it can actually make them happier too.”

Speaking the philosophy of system